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Begins: Sep 8, 2014
Date: Tue, Sep 30th, 2014
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For once I am at a loss for words on how to conclude my travels this month, Im not sure there is really anything left to say.
My purpose was not to head out and hike a set trail or to climb any large mountains. I was not trying to achieve a lifelong dream or to become one of a few people to complete a challenging goal.
I simply went to look and experience a place I had never been. To fulfil a promise I had made. To try and ease some of the pain I have been carrying with me for what seems like a long time now, but also feels like an instant too.
The Isle of Skye did not disappoint in any way. It is, and now always will be for me, a magical and special place. It will be where I have shared amazing and wonderful moments with my dad, who I certainly feel is watching over me with both pride and pleasure at my journey.
It is a place I should encourage all to go and take time to enjoy, to be at peace and calm, but part of me wants to keep it secret too my own safe haven.
I have returned home to find that the constant ache and sorrow I have carried seems to have lessened. As if a burden or weight has somehow been lifted from me and life is just that bit, well I dont know, but it feels I can move a little more forward now. Not that missing my dad hurts any less, just that I dont have to think about it all the time right now. I understand the pain will always be there, it just doesnt have to be at the forefront of my mind. I wont lose my memories or love my dad any less just because I dont always feel sad.
Part of me feels lighter knowing he is getting to enjoy some of the best scenery Skye has to offer. He is now part of the natural world, part of the science he taught so passionately about. He is home here in the UK where he always wanted to come back to. And I made that happen for him. For me, that helps with my loss.
My Nalgene still sits with me. It is a comfort.
I know that at some point next year, we shall return again together searching for new places to explore and more porpoises to watch. Until that time I shall continue to live life and be content thinking of my dad resting at Bioda Buidhe and Glenbrittle, waiting for me join him.
"Travel empties out everything you've put into the box called your life, all the things you accumulate to tell yourself who you are" - Claire and Mia Fontaine