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Begins: Apr 14, 2010
Date: Sat, Apr 24th, 2010
Start: Campo, CA
End: 70 miles out
Daily Distance: 10
Trip Distance: 10.0
Entry Visits: 610
Journal Visits: 6,705
Guestbook Views: 353
Guestbook Entrys: 8
After 7 long days and 70 miles, I decided to come home.
The first few days were really great. Hard. Physical. I was meeting all sorts of people, and I was hiking with Gramelissa and Shroomer. Then I started falling behind. And starting having serious emotional and mental hardships. My feet were absolutely killing me. And my back ached so bad it hurt to breathe. I had gone over everything in my pack with Jackass and Molasses. There wasn't anything more to get ride of, say a few pounds from buying a more expensive pack. But a few pounds wouldn't change much of how bad I was hurting.
All I could think was "If I hate this so much, why am I here? Why push on? What am I doing here?" And I couldn't really answer. On one hand, I liked the outdoors, but not like this. And I wanted to acomplish something huge, but at what cost?
I called my boyfriend Travis, who I'd been talking to every night. I ended up balling. He encouraged me, Told me to give it some time, it couldnt get worse.
But it did. I called everyday. I was lonely. Ameoaba was hiking and camping with me, and she was so great to talk to, but I was alone and in pain all day. I would try not to cry, I didn't want every conversation I had with Travis to be tears.
I remembered one night, I camped not even 1/4 mile from the trail, and I could barely walk. I sat down and called Travis and cried, within ear shot of everyone. It was so freaking windy. I had tried calling him all day, and even with service bars, I couldn't get through. It was over frustrating. I was depressed. And every mile I took led me deeper into depression.
The next/ last day I woke up, still in pain. Most nights, it would subside will I slept and I would be good for 3 or 4 miles. It was cold and windy still. I hiked for an hour, then called mom. I cried, telling her how miserable I was and that I couldn't do this for a month. I knew it'd take too long to adjust. I'd done it a week. Mom and Dad always promised to rescue me if I needed it, and I was coming to my end.
After I hung up, I trudge on. During late morning, I felt good. And I decided to come home. And then I felt like I could make it out. That I could end this.
Ameoaba and I took a wrong turn and hiked out about a mile before finding the real trail. It was actually kind of pretty. Old narley tree roots growing around boulders like a gigantic bonsi. A stream of water. Real grass. A squirrel. I kinda liked it, and was sad all the trail wasn't like this.
Knowing I'd be going home, I took lots of wildflower pictures.
I hobbled into the PCT Store around mile 68 (a campsite in the middle of no where) and bought a candy bar and soda, and directions to get to town. I walked the 2 or more miles down a dirt road to Banner, a one store "town". The wind picked up and black clouds formed. I called a taxi to get to the next real town, where I could get a motel and catch the bus home. As I waited for the taxi, the sun setting, a blizzard of snow blew in.
I heard it was really hard for hikers that night, and all the ones I knew hitched out the next day and stayed in Warner Springs. No one had their warm clothes.
So, that's it for now. I'm home recuperating. And planning some pct hiking in washington. I believe it's still my goal to finish someday, but maybe I need more of a warm up, where I hike for the outdoors and adventure and beauty and company. Southern California was a higher level for me. I'll need to work up to it. :)
The Pacific Crest Trail (PCT) is a 2,650-mile national scenic trail that runs from Mexico to Canada through California, Oregon and Washington. The PCT traverses 24 national forests, 37 wilderness areas and 7 national parks. The PCT passes through 6 out of 7 of North Americas ecozones. Learn more: www.pcta.org
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